"O" is for Others This next concept is the key to success, but unfortunately it is rather complicated to implement well. Children exhibiting RAD traits can be very attention-seeking and dramatic, and how that manifests is in attempts to be seen as a victim. A small example: a child once candidly stated to me that he’d figured out that to get what he wants, he manipulates people to feel sorry for him.  Communicating with others present in the child’s life is imperative . To begin, I am...

Chapter 8 - "R" is for Respect/Reflective Tone  Respect is key to my entire approach. It is a very popular opinion in Appalachia, and likely in other areas as well, that respect needs to be earned to be deserved and if I am not shown respect, I don’t need to return respect. I think this is faulty thinking; when I worked with foster kids, especially teens, the first thing I told them is, “I will respect you, if you respect me.” They had heard various forms of that statement throughout their...

"T" is for Trust These children have lost trust in the people who are trying to care for them, the people who are neglecting them, and/or with the world at large. Many experts stress consistency and structure and encourage parents to implement a routine that is to be followed daily. I think there is a place for doing things the same way, especially at bedtime, but too much structure can be harmful. In the case of children with Reactive Attachment Disorder, it gives these hyper-vigilant...