Chapter 8 - Respect/Reflective Tone  Respect is key to my entire approach. It is a very popular opinion in Appalachia, and likely in other areas as well, that respect needs to be earned to be deserved and if I am not shown respect, I don’t need to return respect. I think this is faulty thinking; when I worked with foster kids, especially teens, the first thing I told them is, “I will respect you, if you respect me.” They had heard various forms of that statement throughout th

"T" is for Trust These children have lost trust in the people who are trying to care for them, the people who are neglecting them, and/or with the world at large. Many experts stress consistency and structure and encourage parents to implement a routine that is to be followed daily. I think there is a place for doing things the same way, especially at bedtime, but too much structure can be harmful. In the case of children with Reactive Attachment Disorder, it gives these hype

Chapter 6 - "N" is for Neutrality & Non-Defensiveness When one understands that the child’s goal is control of others and of situations, it’s easier to see that when they are acting out, they are often trying to manipulate others’ emotions and reactions. If they can make the parent/caregiver mad, then they are the “puppet master” of sorts and can bend the situation in the direction they want it to go. If the parent/guardian (in cases of children with RAD it is usually the...

Chapter 5 - “O” is for Options  I think most parents incorporate offering options or choices to their kids as a way to help them start...